Jason Donovan / I Heart Labrador Records – Jam On Bread

My music taste – like, I assume most people's is – is cyclical in nature; while I love almost all music almost all of the time without exception I do tend to favour a specific genre/facet of music at any given time. If you were to ask me what my internal jukebox is playing on repeat right now I'd have to go with the keywords: twee, indie (in the purest sense of the word), ukulele (you can blame MJ Hibbett for that one), primary school music lessons (tambourines, glockenspiel, simplistic rhyming schemes) and Scandinavia. Generally acts will fall into a couple of those categories and that's more than enough, but Jam On Bread has only gone and blown it out of the water.

On his myspace Jam On Bread – or Stephen as he's known when he's not being the performing music man – describes himself as a "borecore pioneer" and "an incompetent bearded man singing songs about sea creatures", which is unnecessarily harsh as self-deprecation always is. Although he does sort of have a point since his chin is somewhat bushy and he does have songs about manatees and isopods; he is not, however, boring.

Jason Donovan – which was today's random song – is not the ode to Kylie's 80s paramour which the title suggests, rather Mister Donovan proves himself to most useful to our singer / songwriter / protagonist by being gracious enough to have provided the world with lyrics that one can use when they're writing love letters to their other girlfriends: "There's too many broken hearts in the world" indeed.

Jason Donovan isn't really the song I want to write about or bring to your attention, while it does meet several of my arbitrarily decided criteria Jam On Bread has actually done the almost unthinkable and scored five out of five. Twee? Check. Indie? Recorded on a £4 microphone, check. Ukulele? Check. Primary school music lessons? Check. Scandinavia? If truth be told he's from Grimsby, but the song in question, the one which pushes him over the edge into five-out-of-five territory, is called I Heart Labrador Records which namechecks Irene, Sambassadeur, Acid House Kings, Suburban Kids With Biblical Names and virtually everyone else on Labrador's roster. He's going to get a very big check in the Scandinavian column and a spot on my much-coveted Scandimania! playlist for that.

I Heart Labrador Records? Yeah, me too.

http://www.myspace.com/jamonbreadyay

Konichiwa Bitches – Robyn

Speaking strictly as a resident of the UK and therefore one exposed mainly to the musical tastes of these fair isles, the platinum blonde, Swedish electro-pop pixie Robyn - the most killingest pop star on the planet - has done the near unthinkable. Ten years after her one hit – Show Me Love - back in the heady days of 1997, she returned with a cracking album, an infectious single or two and the refreshing presence of a pop princess that doesn't have to be a big pile of paparazzi-bating crazy.

Taken from her self-titles album (the one which in the UK would be considered her second, but as Scandinavia would be more than willing to point out is actually her fourth) Konichiwa Bitches is an electro-pop cartoon-rap romp through the kind of world that Froke Carlsson inhabits. A world where she's a hard fighting, ass-kicking, red-hot, tasty and bursting at the seams. A world pretty much like this one in fact...'xcept filthier. Ahoy there double entendres, how the popverse has missed you.

See you next Tuesday, you is a punk.

Listen:

Powered by Podbean.com

Watch: Youtube [Monkey puppet! Giant comedy telephone! Dancing Penguin! BEE SUIT!!!!!]

Atlas - Battles

Today I leave you in the-more-than capable hands of Tom from Video Killed The Radio Star.

To the uneducated (i.e. the majority of people), Battles are a group of ridiculously talented musicians heralding from the other side of the Atlantic, classed in some peoples eyes as Post-Rock. Post-Rock is a bit of a dirty word (or words) these days, so when I read about this “Poppy Post-Rock” I wasn’t quite sure what to make of it.

This for me was the “song of 2007” (cliché). Seven-odd minutes of pure, absolute genius. The indecipherable helium vocals (which, as fans of Animal Collective know, are so in right now), the ever so sinister shifting drum beat which powers through the song like nobody’s business, and of course one of my favourite breakdowns of all time (which is kind of like saying “my favourite somewhat self indulgent mid-song instrumental of all time”, but you get the gist). But there’s one subtle flaw to this songs brilliance.

This minor, itty bitty flaw is the fact that it’s one of the least accessible pop songs ever conceived. Firstly, you probably won’t appreciate the initial likeness of the drumbeat to Disposable Teens, and those vocals which initially made me howl with fear (ish). What’s this about a singer with a crook? You what? However, before time is quite up you’ll grow to love the drumbeat, grow to love the catchy little guitar piece mid song, grow to love the breakdown, realise that this song probably is the greatest single musical thing that you could possibly ever hear live, bang your head against the table in awe of its just overall amazingness and then, after you’ve heard it enough times, you’ll finally admit that the vocals aren’t that awful.

Listen:

Website: http://www.myspace.com/battlestheband

Watch: Youtube

Stand And Deliver – Adam And The Ants

Da quiddly qa qa, da diddly qa qa! Your money or your life!

Adam Ant – the 80s' largest consumer of tippex – was the crown prince of the new wave (you'll note how I carefully avoided labelling him the Prince Charming of new wave). With their over the top costumes and extravagant music videos some might write Adam and the Ants off as the epitome of the 80s where looks won over content, and even if they were all about that, it didn't matter as Adam and his loyal band of Ants knew it was all about that.

Stand And Deliver sees the artist formally known as Stuart Goddard taking on the role of an eighteenth century dandy highwayman. There's a little bit about stealing from those unlucky enough to have crossed the highwayman's path, but for the most part the lyrics revolve around shameless self-promotion "I'm the dandy highwayman who you're too scared to mention / I spend my cash on looking flash and grabbing your attention" and the occasional spot of mocking at the expense of others' fashion choices: "I'm the dandy highwayman so sick of easy fashion / the clumsy boots, peek-a-boo roots that people think so dashing" – although the very idea of Adam Ant critiquing others' fashion choices does sound ever-so pot-kettle-black.

Behind the Ant-centric lyrics is a thumping incessant drumbeat which drives the song while scorching rockier-than-usual guitar riffs slog away on top. Not that it matter how serious the music is, because, as with all of their songs, there is something undeniably pantomime about the whole thing. It's very British, very camp, very 80s and - most importantly - very fun.

Listen:

Powered by Podbean.com

Watch: Youtube [Not to sound like an old fogey, but that was back in the days when they made proper music videos]

Some Of You Boys (And Most Of You Girls) - Robin Black and The Intergalactic Rockstars

Robin Black and the Intergalactic Rockstars (now, alas, they've dropped the "and the Intergalactic Rockstars" addendum to their moniker) are a rag tag bunch of Canadians who are firmly out of their time. Instead of the 21^st century that the rest of us spend our days lazing/toiling away in, Robin Black and the rest of his band (for the lead singer named the band after himself) work away under the misunderstanding that it is still 1982 and that lyrca-clad, big-haired Mötley Crüe wannabes have a place in this world. As the bastard love children of Johnny Thunders, Tommy Lee and The Jetsons, each of the members of the band have re-christened themselves with suitably space-age names – Killer Ky, Starboy and K-Tron to pick but three from the liner notes – all the better to play that intergalactic glam metal with, you understand.

The music is as lazy as you'd expect it to be. It's huge riffs perfect for posturing and posing to, accompanied by shoddily constructed lyrics. But then it's glam metal it's not supposed to be big and clever, it's supposed to be huge, stupid, stadium rocking anthems about girls and drinking and sex and having sex with girls while drinking.

In fairness to Robin Black Some Of You Boys (And Most Of You Girls) doesn't stick exactly to the above formula; instead of sex with girls it introduces the notion of sex with boys as well. Of course it does, after all it is the space age and if we learned anything from the first gentleman of the space age, Mister Ziggy Stardust, it's that in the space age no one cares about what you've got inside your pants.

Robin Black currently hosts a reality tv show in Canada.

Listen:

Powered by Podbean.com

Watch: Youtube

Totally Bone – Dananananaykroyd

Dananananaykroyd – quite possibly the most difficult band name in existence to spell correctly (their website hosts a leader board of the misspellings) – sidled their way into my peripheral vision via BBC2 Scotland's Music Show (which, by the by, is probably the most King Creosote-centric programme on tv). After watching said televisual performance I hoofed it down to my lovely, lovely local independent record shop to procure their sounds on 7" wide engraved circles of plastic, which was easy enough until the time came for the exchange of cash for goods and the poor boy behind the counter attempted to type the band's name into the electrified till to process said transaction. It's Dan – three times "an" – aykrod. Think Batman meets The Blues Brothers. Annoyingly the night they appeared locally was the one weekend of the entire year where I had to be out of town, and so I'm yet to experience first hand what some people are calling "one of the finest live bands in Britain doing what they do best".

The Glaswegian indie-rock sextext have only been together since 2006, have – to date – only released two singles and remain unsigned. They also have two drummers, an indie-boy wet-dream on bass and are fuckin' mental. But fuckin' mental in a good way. Dananananaykroyd make a noise, sure you can call it music, it is music, but more accurately it's melodious noise. The band themselves call it fight-pop, which is as an accurate description as any you're likely to get.

Totally Bone blends post-punk stuttering, hardcore crunchy guitars and a heart of pure pop gold. The kind of song that would gatecrash your party, trash your flat, then flash you a single grin and you'd have to forgive it, because it wasn't doing it out of malice, it was just having a good time. And maybe, just maybe, you'd even join in.

Listen:

Powered by Podbean.com

Watch: Totally Bone on BBC2 Scotland's The Music Show [Youtube]

Buy: Totally Bone / Hey Giles Single via Moshi Moshi

The Yeah Yeah Yeah Song – The Flaming Lips

It's the one where Oklahoma's premier purveyor of alternative psychedelia, wordy song titles and fancy dress costumes go all political. So what would you do if you had all the power in the world?

If you could blow up the world with the flick of a switch would you do it?
No, because that's a completely fuckwitted thing to do. Are you listening nuclear weapons wielding folks?

If you could make everybody poor just so you could be rich would you do it?
No, that's just simply mean.

If you could watch everybody work while you just lay on your back would you do it?
Well, it would be hard to make an argument against this one, I do love the life of luxury, but if I were the only one lying about doing nothing surely it would get boring quite quickly, as everyone would be too busy working to spend any time with me.

If you could take all the laughs without giving any back would you do it?
No, I like to laugh just as much as I like making people laugh. Isn't that universal?

If you could make your own money and then give it to everybody would you do it?
No, because that undermines the entire global economy. If you simply print money as and when you want it then it becomes worthless.

If you knew all the answers and could give to the masses would you do it?
Yes. No ifs ands or buts. I think people have a right to know what's happening in their world. Obviously they don't need to know everything, but if they want to know then they should have the right to know and not to have to jump through hoops to find out.

Are you crazy?
No, well, no more so than anyone else.

With all your power what would you do?
Ideally something that had no detrimental effect to anyone or anything, but what that would be I don't know.

Alas, my answers don't fit into the tune nearly as well; so we'll have to stick with the classics: "no, no, no, no, no" and "yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah".

Listen:

Powered by Podbean.com

Watch: Youtube

What A Waster – Adam Green (Libertines cover)

I've had this track floating about on various mp3 players for a good five or six years now (I can accurately place it as I know I first downloaded it when living in Germany in 2002/03) and always thought it was just a rare Adam Green – or maybe even a Moldy Peaches - track. It didn't appear on any albums so I pegged it as a b-side, rarity or whatever it would come to be known as when it inevitably saw release on a compilation filler album. Approximately two and a half seconds of googling for a little background to the song so as to flesh out this little review type thing here, and I found out that What A Waster isn't a rare Adam Green track, it's actually a cover of a song originally by Britain's second favourite junkie (after Amy Winehouse, naturally) Mister Peter Doherty and those Libertines of his. Well, that just puts a damper on the whole thing, because I like the song, but Pete Doherty just needs to be put out of our misery.

As the title suggests, What A Waster is indeed about a waster, but shock! horror! the waster in question is not oxygen thief Doherty, rather some cheap hooker who spends her days snorting whatever powder she can get her hands on, writing a load of bollocks that supposed to be profound and generally acting like a complete an utter cunt. Remind you of anyone?

Personally I prefer Green's version of the song to the original for purely superficial reasons: (1) I'd rather listen to Green that The Libertines any day; (2) Thanks to tabloid journalism I can no longer separate the music of Doherty/The Libertines from the thieving junkie twat that litters the gossip columns and (3) I heard Green's version first.

Listen:

Powered by Podbean.com

Watch: Adam Green - Live [Youtube] / Libertines – not live [Youtube]

Here Comes The Summer - The Undertones

Sure, it is January, there is actual snow on the ground outside and it is absolutely fuckin' perishing outside, but right here I've got one minute and forty four seconds worth of classic pop punk that will instantly make you forget about the icicles outside your window.

Sunshine, girls, beaches, the whole shebang. As Mister Sharkey so eloquently puts it: HERE COMES THE SUMMER!

Listen:

Powered by Podbean.com

Watch: Undertones! Blackpool! Goths! Irn Bru! over on Youtube.

Lounger - Dogs Die In Hot Cars

Dogs Die In Hot Cars were successful for about two weeks back in the summer of 2004 then promptly faded into obscurity before breaking up to very little no fanfare.

As St. Andrews' version of Futureheads the poppy new-wave inspired sounds of Dogs Die In Hot Cars were hook-laden catchy tunes that, unfortunately, never really caught anyone. I saw them a couple of times when they were gigging around these parts – hardly surprising since, until The View (who are something of an embarrassment) came along, they were possibly the most successful local band from these parts. For my money the reason that they folded like a cheap hooker under a fat guy, is that despite their début and only album – Please Describe Yourself – being a perfectly polished gem, their live sets simply did not live up to liner-noted, pro-tooled shiny disc.

Lounger – like most of their songs – is a wordy affair; how many pop songs can you think of that reference both Charles de Gaulle and King Harold II? But the song isn't about 1066 or French politics or any of the things suggested by reference to the two of them, rather it's about the exact opposite. Lounger is a celebration – if that's the right word – of not learning, of giving up and forgetting everything that you were taught in school in order to lie around in bed all day. While I adore the bouncy keyboard, guitars and general Talking-Heads-ness of the tune, I can't bring myself to agree with the sentiment, I can't endorse throwing away years of education just so you don't have to tidy your bedroom. I just can't.

Listen:

Powered by Podbean.com

Watch: Youtube [And no, that's not the band it's just three boys with too much time on their hands]